What do we mean by TRANSFORMING what you read?
-You MUST use details from the text and root your answers to question 1 in what you have read in order to get marks for reading. This means not making things up!
-However, you need to make sure you change the wording and develop the details you use (TRANSFORM them) to make them suit the new style of writing. 'Mechanical lifting from the text' (i.e. directly copying words or phrases) will keep you at a Band 5.
-However, you need to make sure you change the wording and develop the details you use (TRANSFORM them) to make them suit the new style of writing. 'Mechanical lifting from the text' (i.e. directly copying words or phrases) will keep you at a Band 5.
Steps to success...1) Read through the passage
2) Identify the style you are being asked to write in 3) In 30 secs, jot down/remind yourself of the success criteria for the style 4) Number the bullet points 1,2 and 3 5) Underline key words in point 1. Be sure WHAT you are looking for. 6) Skim and Scan through the passage, identifying details from the text to use for point 1. Label them with a '1' in the margin. Find at least 4 points. 7) Underline key words in point 2. Be sure WHAT you are looking for. 8) Skim and Scan through the passage, identifying details from the text to use for point 2. Label them with a '2' in the margin. Find at least 4 points.Look at the example below for how this works. 9) Underline key words in point 3. Be sure WHAT you are looking for. Remember - point 3 may be more difficult to find explicit evidence for (as may be the case for 2 and 1 - you will have to infer). 6) Skim and Scan through the passage, identifying details/clues from the text to use for point 3. Label them with a '3' in the margin. Find at least 3 points. 7) Look back at your page. You have now identified a number of details from the text that you can use for each 1/2 page (bullet point) AND you know which style you are writing in. You're ready to write! 8) Either write 1/2 page for each bullet point or weave all three points together throughout the text. HORROR PLAGUE OVERWHELMS VILLAGERSIntroduction paragraph for newspaper (What/Where/When/Who):
This week, hundreds of men, women and children have fallen prey to a deadly plague sweeping through the village of Malsalm. 12 people have died and many more are in critical condition as the plague spreads unchecked. |
Example:Ellie has reached step 8 of the 'steps to success' process (see left). She's read the passage and question (see below), she knows she needs to write in the style of the newspaper report (and has noted down the success criteria for it) and she has identified details for each bullet point. She's written her opening paragraph (see left). But how does she 'transform' the writing?
Look at the example below: the details Ellie identified for bullet point 2 are in red. The attitudes of the villagers to the Duvall family; Ellie needs to use these details without just copying them into the newspaper report. She needs to make them fit the newspaper style, and develop the ideas. Look how she does it: DETAIL: 'relatively new to the village of Malsam' TRANSFORMS into: The Duvall Family have only been living in Malsalm since the beginning of the year. Ellie rearranges the details and puts them in her own words. She is careful to write in a style expected from a newspaper article. She develops ideas and modifies them while staying consistent to the text. DETAILS: 'played noisily with good friends they had made' and 'becoming well-known for his finely crafted furniture, and life was good here. TRANSFORMS into: The family settled easily into the life of the village. The Duvall children, Gabriel (6) and Lucien (8) often play with other children in the village and are popular. Mr Duvall's (46) furniture business had been enjoying early success with his neighbours. It is clear to Ellie that the attitude of the villagers was very positive to the Duvalls, but that this will have changed after the 'Horror Plague Overwhelms Villagers'. Her newspaper reporter will have to trace this change. . |
Question 1
1 Imagine you are a reporter investigating the cause of an infestation of mice that has occurred
throughout the village of Malsam.
Write your report for a national newspaper, using the headline: ‘Horror Plague Overwhelms
Village. ’
You should include the following:
• the effects of the infestation on the villagers;
• the attitudes of the villagers to the Duvall family;
• the comments of the Duvall parents and children.
Base the news report on what you have read in Passage A and be careful to use your own words.
Write between 1½ and 2 sides, allowing for the size of your handwriting.
Up to fifteen marks will be available for the content of your answer, and up to five marks for
the quality of your writing.
[Total: 20]
throughout the village of Malsam.
Write your report for a national newspaper, using the headline: ‘Horror Plague Overwhelms
Village. ’
You should include the following:
• the effects of the infestation on the villagers;
• the attitudes of the villagers to the Duvall family;
• the comments of the Duvall parents and children.
Base the news report on what you have read in Passage A and be careful to use your own words.
Write between 1½ and 2 sides, allowing for the size of your handwriting.
Up to fifteen marks will be available for the content of your answer, and up to five marks for
the quality of your writing.
[Total: 20]
Passage
The Duvall family were relatively new to the village of Malsam. They had feared a long period of suspicion, but even gimlet-eyed old women, who normally took months to unbend and acknowledge newcomers, warmed to the blond-haired children and their gentle parents.
The weather in these parts was less hospitable. The wind never settled and, as the Duvalls gathered by the fire each night, their little home wheezed and moaned like an out of tune accordion. Even though the floors were spotless, and Katya, the mother, insisted on cleanliness in this new home of theirs,
draughts still made skittering noises.The children, Gabriel and Luca, did schoolwork upstairs, but more often played noisily with good friends they had made. Henri, their father, was becoming well-known for his finely crafted furniture, and life was good here.
One night, when the grumbling of their home was low, Henri and Katya were about to settle to sleep, when they both heard unfamiliar sounds; tiny scratchings and patterings started and stopped. ‘It’s probably a couple of little field mice looking for a warm place for the winter,’ Henri said, and Katya smiled as she fondly remembered the pictures of the family of mice in the story book she used to read to the children when they were very young.
Lifting the flour sack next morning, Henri was surprised to see a trail like a white path across the dark flagstones of the kitchen. Looking closely, he spotted a gnawed hole, the size of a small coin, in the bottom of the sack. Katya made her own discoveries: chewed biscuit boxes, or sometimes the biscuits themselves, looked ragged around the edges and she threw them away in disgust. Even their store of candles had tiny teeth marks that ran up and down each one, looking for all the world as if a small creature had been eating a cob of maize but had fallen asleep during its meal.
That night in bed they couldn’t sleep. Their ears strained to hear any movement and, as soon as the oil lamp was dimmed, the room became alive with chattering, scuttling and squeaking. The couple lay on their raft of safety as the sea of movement and noise swelled around them. The squeaking became
shrill and angry. There were interminable gnawing sounds that to the couple seemed as loud as men sawing through hard wood. Objects, buttons or spools of thread rolled around them, threatening to drown the couple’s sanity, until Henri could stand it no longer and his hand reached for the matches on the bedside table. As he did so, a warm body squirmed over his hand, and he felt the scratch of claws and the trail of a bald tail. He stifled a groan of disgust, but when the oil lamp illuminated the bedroom, both he and his wife cried out as a swell of writhing, glistening, grey rodents with long, dirty, gristly tails took less than a minute to retreat under the floor boards, behind the skirting and into the thatch.The light stayed on until the sanctuary of morning. During that sleepless night, the couple agreed that this problem needed to be tackled, soon.
They decided that Henri would have to travel to the nearest city in order to buy sufficient poison. The children must not be told; no one must ever find out that their home harboured vermin. These were still superstitious times in a village whose oldest inhabitant could remember the plague, carried by vermin, which had wiped out three quarters of their population. If word got out, the parents knew that their family would be hounded from their happy home, without belongings, without a place to go, without mercy.
Eventually Henri returned, his knapsack full of certain death, but his pockets bulging with sweet things to silence the children and to get them out of the way. Tonight, Henri would save his family. He wasted no time in setting to work the minute the children were tucked up in bed that night. Granules of black powder were placed in every strategic position: in cupboards, under skirting, in the rafters, the cellar and even at the back of the stove. By the third night the results finally showed: silence. The couple slept for the first time in an exhausting week.Soon everything returned to normal. Relief washed over the couple when neighbours called by or the children’s friends came to play. However, all the anxiety of late had caused them not to notice just how quiet and secretive their children had recently become.If the parents had looked into Gabriel and Luca’s room they would have understood the reason. In a small box, lined with sheep wool and an old sock, lay a light grey mother mouse, bright eyes semi-closed, contented and at peace. She nuzzled her six ‘babies’ as they suckled and slept, their little mouths pink and puckered, so vulnerable and so adored. The mother’s whiskers twitched with delight as her warm tail wrapped around her brood. Nothing would harm them, not with the children looking after this little family straight out of their favourite story book of old
TRANSFORMING FOR DIFFERENT STYLES
The same detail will transform in different ways depending for the style you will be writing on.
Take this detail: superstitious times in a village whose oldest inhabitant could remember the plague, carried by vermin, which had wiped out three quarters of their population.
Look how it changes depending on the style...
Report: Only 80 years ago, 75% of Malsam's population was killed in a similar plague (it was also spread by rodents). The oldest inhabitant of the village, Jenny Jackson (96), has now witnessed both disastrous events.
Letter: And, how terrible! This is the second time such a disaster has struck. Old Jenny so gloomily told us how, when she was a child, three quarters of the town was killed by an almost identical disease. Three quarters! Can you imagine living through two such experiences?
Speech: It is undeniable this is a tragedy. I accept that. But, it is a tragedy we can conquer, it is a tragedy that our ancestors in Malsam have conquered before. Three quarters of our people were struck down years ago. One quarter rebuilt this town. One quarter grew strong. They made us what we are today. Jenny here is living proof of our survival. Can we not repeat this positive? Are we not strong like they were?
Interview:
Interviewer: How does it feel to be watching history repeat itself?
Jenny: (unsteadily) It's....it's...unimaginably hard. You see some things so terrible. You lose so many friends. You only expect that to happen once, you know?
Interview: It is so hard.
Jenny: (interrupting) Malsam is a good town, with good people. The Duvalls seemed kind, but...
Take this detail: superstitious times in a village whose oldest inhabitant could remember the plague, carried by vermin, which had wiped out three quarters of their population.
Look how it changes depending on the style...
Report: Only 80 years ago, 75% of Malsam's population was killed in a similar plague (it was also spread by rodents). The oldest inhabitant of the village, Jenny Jackson (96), has now witnessed both disastrous events.
Letter: And, how terrible! This is the second time such a disaster has struck. Old Jenny so gloomily told us how, when she was a child, three quarters of the town was killed by an almost identical disease. Three quarters! Can you imagine living through two such experiences?
Speech: It is undeniable this is a tragedy. I accept that. But, it is a tragedy we can conquer, it is a tragedy that our ancestors in Malsam have conquered before. Three quarters of our people were struck down years ago. One quarter rebuilt this town. One quarter grew strong. They made us what we are today. Jenny here is living proof of our survival. Can we not repeat this positive? Are we not strong like they were?
Interview:
Interviewer: How does it feel to be watching history repeat itself?
Jenny: (unsteadily) It's....it's...unimaginably hard. You see some things so terrible. You lose so many friends. You only expect that to happen once, you know?
Interview: It is so hard.
Jenny: (interrupting) Malsam is a good town, with good people. The Duvalls seemed kind, but...